Hi Jan: This is very intense and a vivid explanation of what occurred. I have been involved in protecting women and children from such abusers, and have first hand experience in dealing with the trauma of such events. Coming to terms with the shame, anger, sorrow and the innocent life taken from you flares beyond the flames of hell. I am sorry for your loss. I say loss, because, what occured took somehting away that can never be returned. There is no excuse for what happened. Regards.