VIETNAM UNCENSORED: 365 DAYS IN A NIGHTMARE

We were not significant, not tough. We weren’t heroes, nor did we see ourselves as brave. But we never questioned what we had to do when it came to surviving the day. We just did it. All our missions carried danger, but we didn’t talk about that. Never. Sometimes, doubt about our chances would creep in, but I’d push it down, take a breath, and move forward.

There was no John Wayne. No, Rambo. No one who could kill with a glance or punch his way through anything. But every man on the team was magic in some way. You couldn’t explain how we did what we did. You just had to see it.

For me, leading wasn’t about shouting orders to send men into fire. My job was to keep them alive. In a place like that, I knew the odds were slim. I didn’t expect divine intervention, nor did I believe our past sins would come back to bite us. What mattered most was what the men on my team thought of me. The rest — outside opinions — didn’t matter. But every decision went sideways.

I could’ve flipped a coin. It would’ve been just as good. Nothing went according to plan. Nothing. Vietnam, I realized, never unfolded as I imagined. It was like trying to see through a fogged-up shower door — my judgments appeared clouded, my sense of reality distorted. On every mission, we knew we were dead men walking. It was just a matter of when we’d return…